Steel Panther – “Heavy Metal Rules”
STEEL PANTHER, la band californiana a più alto tasso si sostenistrici femminili, è fuori con il suo quinto lavoro discografico.
Oggi 27 settembre, il filantropico quartetto composto da Michael Starr, Satchel, Lexxi Foxx e Stix Zadinia, ha pubblicato il quinto album in studio dal titolo “Heavy Metal Rules”.
Il disco è stato anticipato dal singolo “All I Wanna Do Is Fuck (Myself Tonight)”, accompagnato dal videoclip girato a Las Vegas con la presenza di numerose celebrità della musica, della commedia, di YouTube e altro ancora.
“HEAVY METAL RULES” – TrackList e Cover
[toggler title=”01. Zebraman – Testo (Lyrics)” ]
[Inteviewer]
What’s your philosophy on life?
[Zebraman]
Oh it’s me
It’s sucks shit!
Heavy metal rules, heavy metal rules
All that punk shit sucks, it doesn’t belong in this world. It belongs on fuckin’ mars, man. What the hell is punk shit?
And Madonna can go to hell as far as I’m concerned, she’s a dick
I mean seriously, heavy metal definitely rules
Twisted Sister, Judas Priest, Dokken, Ozzy, Scorpions, they all rule
[/toggler]
[toggler title=”02. All I Wanna Do Is Fuck (Myself Tonight) – Testo (Lyrics)” ]
[Intro]
Sexy
[Verse 1]
You lookin’ good
But not good enough
To take my mind off the really hot stuff
If you want a hot love injection
You have to love as good as my reflection
Lipstick
Eyeliner
No bitch around here is finer
If you really wanna get with me
You have to be as fine as I can be
That’s right!
[Chorus]
All I wanna do is
(Fuck! Fuck!)
Fuck myself tonight
All I wanna do is
(Fuck! Fuck!)
Fuck myself ‘til the morning light
All I wanna do is
(Fuck! Fuck!)
Fuck myself tonight
All I wanna do is
(Fuck! Fuck!)
I can’t resist those sexy leopard tights
[Verse 2]
You’re a 9 there ain’t no doubt
I love your boobies and your sexy pout
You tell me you’re a virgin
But I’m late for my plastic surgeon
Tummy tuck
Lip injection
Facial peels for my complexion
Implants perk up my ass
I wanna fuck you baby, but I have to pass ‘cause
[Chorus]
All I wanna do is
(Fuck! Fuck!)
Fuck myself tonight
All I wanna do is
(Fuck! Fuck!)
It turns me on when I put up a fight
All I wanna do is
(Fuck! Fuck!)
Fuck myself tonight
All I wanna do is
(Fuck! Fuck!)
A full-length beard never looked so fucking right
[Bridge]
I can’t help rejecting the women that I date
When I look into my eyes I have to masturbate
(Look at me bitch!)
All I wanna do is
Fuck myself tonight
Fuck myself ‘til the morning light
Fuck myself tonight
[Chorus]
All I wanna do is
(Fuck! Fuck!)
Fuck myself tonight (fuck myself tonight)
All I wanna do is
(Fuck! Fuck!)
Fuck myself ‘til the morning light (‘til the morning light)
All I wanna do is
(Fuck! Fuck!)
Fuck myself tonight (fuck myself tonight)
All I wanna do is
(Fuck! Fuck!)
Fuck! (Fuck!)
Fuck! (Fuck!)
Fuck! (Fuck!)
Fuck myself tonight
I’m gonna fuck myself tonight
[/toggler]
[toggler title=”03. Let’s Get High Tonight – Testo (Lyrics)” ]
Mom and dad are out of town
Call the whores it’s going down
Let’s all fuck until the dawn
Fornicate on the neighbors lawn
Let’s get high tonight
Let the brain cells fry tonight
Baby let’s get high
Snort the coke and pass the bong
Crank the new Steel Panther song
I’ve got shrooms and ecstasy
Don’t be shy they’re gluten free!
Let’s get high tonight
Let the brain frells sigh tonight
Baby let’s get high
Don’t worry ‘bout your parents
Cuz they ain’t here tonight
Don’t worry ‘bout the law
Cuz there ain’t a cop in sight
Don’t worry ‘bout the future
Cuz all we got is now
Don’t worry ‘bout getting high as fuck
Cuz I’m gonna show you how
I’m gonna show you how
I’m gonna show you how
30 pizzas, a bottle of Dom
Amex card please and thank you mom
Girls lined up all on their knees
Don’t jizz on the sofa please
Let’s get high tonight
Let the brain cells fry tonight
Baby let’s get high tonight
[/toggler]
[toggler title=”04. Always Gonna Be A Ho – Testo (Lyrics)” ]
[Verse 1]
I fell in love with someone sweet and pure
But you became the world’s biggest whore
I went away for a few weeks or more
You fucked more dudes than I fucked girls on the tour
How can it be?
You got me beat
I’m not the only one who loves to cheat
[Chorus]
Doesn’t matter what ya do or where ya go
You’re always gonna be a ho. Oh!
Don’t care where ya live or who ya know
You’re always gonna be a ho. Ohhhhh!
[Verse 2]
I never knew I could feel quite so sick
I Kissed your mouth and tasted Satchel’s dick
I ran away, went to my Grandpa’s farm
I saw your name tattooed on my Grandpa’s arm
Is there no man you haven’t laid?
Has your vagina never seen the shade?
[Chorus]
Doesn’t matter what ya do or where ya go
You’re always gonna be a ho. Oh!
Don’t care if your Dad is Russell Crowe
You’re always gonna be a ho. Ohhhhh!
[Bridge]
This could be our love’s biggest test
Baby I don’t care if your a ho
Just tell me I’m the best
[Guitar Solo]
[Interlude]
Doesn’t matter if you’re hot
Doesn’t matter if your cold
Doesn’t matter if you got your vagina plated in gold
Doesn’t matter if you live so long you’re covered in mold
You’re always gonna be a ho
It’s a truth, so I am told
[Chorus]
Doesn’t matter what ya do or where ya go
You’re always gonna be a ho. Oh!
You’re always gonna rub my dick and it’s gonna grow
You’re always gonna be a ho. Ohhhhh!
[Outro]
You’re my favorite garden tool
Out in the shed behind the swimming pool
You’re a ho
You’re a fuckin’ ho
[/toggler]
[toggler title=”05. I’m Not Your Bitch – Testo (Lyrics)” ]
Pick up your clothes, take the trash out
Is that really all that love is about?
Give me a back rub, snuggle after sex
This kind of stuff will turn you into my ex
Ain’t gonna do the things you want me to do
You think ”I’m the boss”? I’ve got some news for you
I’m not your bitch, I’m not your bitch
Why you gotta treat me like one?
I’m not your bitch, I’m not your bitch
Why you gotta ruin my fun?
Start the laundry, clean all the sinks
I’m in a quandary and it fucking stinks
Time may be here to lay down the law
Don’t make me beat you with my Panther paw
Find someone else to walk right into your trap
You’ve worn out your welcome, I’ll be taking a nap
I’m not your bitch, I’m not your bitch
Why you gotta be so dumb?
I’m not your bitch, I’m not your bitch
I’m only here to make you cum
Aw, wait for me, baby!
[/toggler]
[toggler title=”06. Fuck Everybody – Testo (Lyrics)” ]
YEAH …
[Verse 1]
Stupid fuckin’ bitch in the fast-lane almost hit my car
Checkin’ her fuckin’ Snapchat on her motherfucking phone
Tried to wave an officer down, he was on Instagram
[Chorus]
Fuck Everybody!
Everybody can suck my dick!
[Verse 2]
Stinky fuckin’ dude on the airplane didn’t wash himself
Smelled like I was trapped inside the carcass of a whale
Flight from LA to Toronto he sat in my fuckin’ row
[Chorus]
Fuck Everybody!
Everybody can suck my dick!
Fuck Everybody!
Everybody can suck my dick!
[Verse 3]
Stepped into some dog shit
Coming home last night, in my fucking driveway
And I donʼt even own a dog
Pick up after your mastiff you lazy fucking cunt
[Chorus]
Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!
Fuck! Everbody
Everybody can suck my dick
Everybody can suck my fuckin’ dick
Everybody can lick my motherfuckin’ balls
Fuck everybody!
Everybody can suck my motherfucking dick
[Guitar Solo]
[Interlude]
Went to my local Starbucks
Ordered my usual fare
Double vanilla latte with whipped cream and cinnamon sprinkles
The dude three people behind me in line
Got his Frappuccino first
Fuck everybody!
Fuck everybody!
Fuck everybody!
[Chorus]
Fuck everybody!
Everybody can suck my dick!
Fuck everbody!
Everybody can suck my motherfuckin’ dick
EVERYONE CAN SUCK MY FUCKIN’ DICK!
[/toggler]
[toggler title=”07. Heavy Metal Rules – Testo (Lyrics)” ]
Couldn’t make no money as a singer
Didn’t seem to get too far
So I sell pot brownies and Vicodin
From the back seat of my car
Movin’ back to Chicago
Gonna rest my achin’ head
Spotify took my last 2 cents
And the butter for my bread
Gene Simmons said it
Rock and roll is dead
Rock and roll is dead
I never did it for the money
I only did it to get laid
But I can’t buy shots for the ladies
If there’s no way to get paid
Now I can’t make money on my good looks
Can’t make it on applause
So I sell nose beers to the kiddos
And thumb my own nose at the laws
But I’m never ever gonna stop playing
Even though rock and roll ain’t paying
Cuz heavy metal rules, heavy metal rules
Heavy metal rules, heavy metal rules
Heavy metal rules
And everybody else can suck my dick
Gonna make my money stealing hub caps
And selling black tar on the streets
Taking handbags from old ladies
While they respond to Trumpy’s Tweets
Apple came to town a ringing
A death knell for the band
If I can’t make money selling records
I’m gonna make it any way I can
And I’m gonna keep on rocking your ass
As long as I’m on the right side of the grass
Cuz heavy metal rules, heavy metal rules (Madonna – she’s a dick!)
Heavy metal rules, heavy metal rules (That punk shit belongs on Mars!)
Heavy metal rules, heavy metal rules (Dokken, Van Halen, they all fucking rule!)
Heavy metal rules
And everybody else can suck my fucking dick
[/toggler]
[toggler title=”08. Sneaky Little Bitch – Testo (Lyrics)” ]
Caught you with your hand in the cookie jar
Shoving cocks in your cookie in the back of your car
You told me it was never gonna happen again
But before you fucked my uncle and my ex best friend
You gotta have the weenie, so why pretend?
You’re a sneaky little bitch
Shoulda known it right from the start
You’re a sneaky little bitch
Your intention was fucking my heart
Right in the ass
Right in the ass
Shoulda seen the signs when you came home late
Naked in a limo at a quarter to eight
In the morning said you didn’t fuck him but I think I know
The kid we got at home has a big Afro
Same color as your ex, Lemonjello
You’re a sneaky little bitch
I could tell by the screen on your phone
You’re a sneaky little bitch
Dicks of all of the guys that you’ve boned
Now I finally have a clue
And I know what you can do
But there’s something you don’t know
I’m a sneaky fucker too
All the anal pics you took
For my private jacker book
I’ve been posting them tonight
To your church’s new website
Caught you like a fish with a worm in your mouth
Taking Peter North on a trip down south
All your friends were laughing like a bunch of cunts
Sure I probably came off like a total dunce
Wish that I could give you herpes more than once
You’re a sneaky little bitch
Shoulda listened to all of my friends
You’re a sneaky little bitch
With your sneaky texts that you send
You’re a sneaky little bitch
Shoulda known it right from the start
You’re a sneaky little bitch
Oh a sneaky, you’re a sticky little shark
[/toggler]
[toggler title=”09. Gods of Pussy – Testo (Lyrics)” ]
Sometimes it’s hard
When all the girls want to fuck you
So you fuck em once
Bu they just keep coming back
And there’s other girls
And your dick wants someone new
But the bitches you fucked before
Are cock blocking you
Gods of pussy
Gods of pussy
Putting our wangs
Into sweet poontangs
Making em gush
In the back of the bus
Gods of pussy
Gods of pussy
Sometimes it sucks
To have a cock so thick and juicy
When the girls get a taste of it
They never want to give it up
So they suck off the drum tech
Just to get back stage
But we don’t want no sludge piggy
Who’s covered in roadie jizz
Gods of pussy
Gods of pussy
Making em hurt
While we make them squirt
Making em squeal
Making em feel
Like leaving their husbands, oh yeah
Gods of pussy
Gods of pussy
We go to work
And we make them twerk
After the show
Fucking 17 hoes
That’s when you know
Your a god of pussy
Gods of pussy
Gods of pussy
Making em scream
Making em cream
Making em bleed
Making em feed
Right from your hand
You’re in the land of the
Gods of pussy
Gods of pussy
Greasing our poles
Filling their holes
We’re in a band
So their dudes understand
We’re gods of pussy
Gods of pussy
Gods of pussy
Gods of pussy
Give em a slap
Give em the clap
They guzzle our jizz
It is what it is
We’re gods of pussy
Gods of pussy!
[/toggler]
[toggler title=”10. I Ain’t Buying What You’re Selling – Testo (Lyrics)” ]
I don’t need a crystal ball
To tell me that I’ll be
Dead from liver failure
Just wait around and see
Don’t need acupuncture
To rid me of my pain
I’ve got pharmaceuticals
And no plans to abstain
Cuz I ain’t buying, I ain’t buying what you’re selling
Cuz I ain’t buying, I ain’t buying what you’re selling
I don’t need confession
To absolve me of my sins
They’re as much a part of me
As a fish is to his fins
I don’t need the government
Or a social safety net
That ponzi scheme will crash someday
If it hasn’t started yet
And I ain’t buying, I ain’t buying what you’re selling
And I ain’t buying, I ain’t buying what you’re selling
If I come across
As if I am complaining
It’s cuz you’re pissing down my back
And you’re telling me it’s raining
Maybe you believe the bullshit
Or maybe you’re just lying
But I ain’t buying
I don’t need conspiracies
Or ufology
To distract me from my happy life
Of mediocrity
I’ve got a labradoodle
And I’ve got the gift of song
And when that’s not enough
I take a ripper off my bong
And I ain’t buying, I ain’t buying what you’re selling
I ain’t buying, I ain’t buying what you’re selling
I ain’t buying, I ain’t buying what you’re selling
[/toggler]
